bakerstreet | Morning after

Morning after

morning after

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ a meme
→ COMMENT WITH YOUR CHARACTER'S NAME, FANDOM, AND PREFERENCE.
→ PICK A CHARACTER YOU WANT TO TAG AND HIT UP RNG (01-10), OR CHOOSE A SCENE OF YOUR OWN.
→ PLAY NICE; NO WANK, FLAMES, OR GENERAL HUMBUGGERY.
( keep in mind that sexual scenarios are the basis of this meme! please enter with caution )
┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ the scenarios

① BREAKFAST IN BED;
your partner is up and about -- maybe dressed, maybe not -- and in the kitchen. what are they making you? could it be... grilled cheese?

② HIT ME BABY;
they're such a peaceful sleeper. a peaceful, sexy sleeper. actually there's too much of that sleeping happening. why don't you wake the up, world's kindest alarm?

③ ESCAPE FROM AZKABED;
you wake up to find they're rummaging about for their clothes, about to leave. why the rush, can't you convince them to stay?

④ THE AFTERNOON AFTER;
and the evening, maybe even the morning after after... hours have passed but you just can't leave each other! or maybe one of you just won't...

⑤ HANGOVER FROM HELL;
there's a tiger in the closet, a baby in the bathroom, and a total stranger curled up beside you. who is this person beside you, smelling of tequila and regret? do they know any more about what, or who, went down than you do?

⑥ WET AND WILD;
don't feel too lonely waking up by yourself -- the shower's on and the sound of water falling is mighty inviting. why don't you get cleaned up -- or down and dirty all over again?

⑦ I'LL SLEEP WHEN I DIE;
sleep? what is this sleep thing you speak of? dawn's breaking and neither of you have gotten a wink, or want one. who's ready for round xxx?

⑧ A BITTER PILL;
turns out the reason you scored wasn't your sparkling wit and magnetic confidence. your partner had an ulterior motive -- they already knew it and you're about to. recon? revenge? rebound? tag and find out, if you can handle the truth!

⑨ THIS ISN'T MINE;
that sleepy person in your living room had a great night -- with your roommate. well, might as well get to know each other while you're both there, right? ... right?

⑩ WILD CARD;
roll more than once and combine scenarios, choose your favorite, or make up your own!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only | Expand All

What could go wrong?

Probably the most famous last words of famous last words and when Alexei suggested Vegas for a New Avengers & Avengers bonding session and the words 'what could go wrong' were spoken, they probably should have expected things to go wrong. When the Asgardian liquor had been brought out - by Sam, of all people - it had really been game over.

Waking up the following morning was easily up on the list of one of the worst things Joaquin has ever had to do - dying that one time is probably the worst - and so it's no surprise when it takes him far too long to realise three things;

1) This isn't his room.
2) He's not alone.
and 3) He's not even sure this is their hotel.

The fourth thing though, and probably one of the biggest things, is the ring fitted snugly on his left ring finger. He had vague memories of a conversation about rebounds escalating to 'don't be a wuss, rebound marriage' and that had led to here. Honestly, it'd been fucking hilarious at the time.

Turning his head slowly, Joaquin squints at John on the other side of the bed and he can't help but snort a laugh, followed immediately by a groan as his head throbs. He was so screwed.

Whoever's moving around needs to stop because John just wants to sleep. When Joaquin starts moving and waking up, all John does is to reach back and smack his hip like that's going to get him to stop moving.

And then he's still for a few seconds before realization pushes its way into his fuzzy head. He doesn't open his eyes but he does start taking stock of the situation.

There's someone in his bed. There's something metal around his finger. And he has vague memories of drunken vows.

That's when he opens his eyes.

"This better be a goddamn dream," he says, not looking over because that would make this real.

Joaquin at least has the good grace to stop moving, settling down once more but this time facing the man in the bed beside him.

His husband.

He snorts another soft laugh, mostly just air escaping his nose in a huff, because if he doesn’t laugh, he may freak out about the fact that he got married to John Walker. Because of what was essentially a dare.

“Shit out of luck, bro.”

"What the hell."

John sits up and stares at the ring on his finger. He's worn one of those before but he'd been cognizant when he'd made that choice. Most of his memories from last night are booze soaked and blurry.

His gaze swings over to Joaquin and he frowns.

"This is your fault."

He doesn't know that, he's just panicking and wants to blame someone.

“My fault? How is this my fault?” Joaquin just gives John a Look, one that says he’s less than impressed with being blamed for this.

“You’re the one who let Alexei goad you to go beyond rebound sex.” Not that Joaquin had done anything to dissuade him, because Tequila Joaquin was an ass to Sober Joaquin and tended to go along with whatever bad decision was going on around. “Don’t stress so much, marido. It’ll be easy enough to get it annulled.” Surely the courts or whatever were used to hearing this story.

"I didn't let him goad me!"

He'd definitely let himself be goaded and he's not proud of it. But, what's done is done. He sits up and stares at the ring. Doesn't try and take it off but he does make faces at it in a very mature fashion.

Then, scrubs angrily at his face, trying not to remember the sex because it had been good and it had been awhile for him.

"Nothing's ever easy," he mutters, shaking his head. "I can't even remember who asked who."

Did it matter? Yes.

Joaquin just gives John a flat look because he absolutely did let Alexei goad him into it. He remembered the chicken noises and everything as the Red Guardian had declared for him to go all out with a rebound marriage.

Honestly, the whole thing was funny, even if there was the typical hangover regrets. Mostly the headache.

At least John's not stressing out about it or anything.

"Don't ask me. I don't remember that either." Did either of them even ask? Or did someone just volunteer him? He did remember the sex though and he would absolutely go there again. He's not going to say that though because John already looks like he may have an aneurysm.

"Great."

Ultimately, it doesn't matter. Because what's done is done and here they are. John rubs his hands against his face and then through his hair.

"What the hell."

He's still trying to wrap his head around this and figure out what to do. Annul it, sure. But, it still happened and while he can't remember the ceremony (god, had they said vows to each other), he can remember other things.

John eyes him through his fingers. "You ever annulled a marriage before?"

Joaquin just continues to watch John as he freaks out over it. He's very aware that they're both completely naked - mostly because he has definitely been checking John out while he's not really paying attention to Joaquin - but he has no interest in getting up to change that yet.

Though maybe he should find out how long they booked this room for and know if they need to check out soon.

"I've never been married, John. I got no idea. But it must be a thing that happens all the time for drunk Vegas marriage." He pulls a face. "Is now a bad time to mention that we're also not in our hotel?"

"What?"

Okay, he hadn't noticed that. He was really off his game, really off balance because he should have noticed that. But now that he looks around, Joaquin's right. They are...not in the hotel he remembers.

Fuck.

"Where are we?" He could get up, go look out the window, go scream down the hall and get someone to tell him but he just stays in bed, continues gaping like an idiot.

"How did we get here?" He knows that Joaquin's not going to know but he can't stop himself from asking the questions out loud.

"John, cariño... Stop freaking out. We're fine." Naked, married, Joaquin is hungover as shit, but they're fine. They may not know where they are, but they know which hotel they should be out and, as soon as Joaquin drags his ass out of bed and finds his pants and his phone, he'll be able to book them an Uber back there so they can reunite with the teams.

"Can you see my pants? Also a bottle of water? Not all of us have super healing and some of us are really fucking hungover."

The one good thing that John isn't is hungover. Thank you super soldier serum. He almost wishes he were though because it'd give him something else to focus on that wasn't what happened.

Still, he does try and calm down. He takes a breath, he rubs his face, tries to pat down his hair into something that isn't ridiculous bedhead.

"Okay." Okay, he can do that. He kind of appreciates being able to do something so he rolls out of bed and onto his knees. He stays there for a second before he stands up and yep, he's naked. Huh.

"We're both naked." He's stating the obvious. He knows what happened and what they did but still. He has to say it.

Joaquin, who up until now has been very aware that they are both, indeed, naked actually snorts a laugh and then groans when his head throbs in response. He also absolutely lets his eyes rake over John's body before looking back up to meet his face.

"Yes. We are. Pretty sure I have your fingerprints imbedded in my hips too." Because why not make a point of it? Although this is probably the opposite way to go if he wants John to calm down. "Water, please? I feel like I'm dying."

"Right, sorry, okay."

Yeah, water. He thinks that maybe he should put his clothes on but he doesn't. His mind focuses on the water and that's what he does, digging out a paper cup from a cabinet and filling it with water.

He comes back and passes it to Joaquin. And then he decides that he wants some water too so he goes back for a second and sips it as he walks out.

"Better?"

Joaquin is absolutely okay with John not putting his clothes back on, only closing his eyes with an arm thrown over his face once he’s out of sight. His head is pounding and his stomach is definitely protesting the amount of liquor he put in it last night. Too bad he’s not in his own room, the one with his bag containing a bottle of Tylenol, because he could really use some of that right now.

He peeks out from under his arm when John returns and sits up enough to drink the water. “Thanks.” God, it feels like the best thing he’s ever drunk. “We have a couple options here.

“One, you get back into bed, we sleep a little more or we don’t sleep until we gotta leave,” yes, he does wink then. “Or two, we call an Uber and do the walk of shame.”

One of those options sounds infinitely better than the other. He's not sure if he's got a walk of shame in him even if getting back into bed and...well, relaxing seems like a difficult idea for him too.

But, he definitely doesn't want to deal with questions from everyone else for a little while so bed it is. He finishes the water and tosses it into the trash can before he moves closer to the bed.

"You asked me," he states even if he doesn't know if that's true or not. "Probably got down on one knee and everything."

“Absolutely sounds like something I’d do because it would be hilarious.” He’s also not sure who did what or how they ended up here - hopefully someone has a memory of how it went down - but he’s far less stressed about it apparently, so whatever.

Lifting the covers, Joaquin invites John back into bed, no shame at all about how it puts his naked body on display. “So… are you more upset that you’re already remarried or that it’s me? ‘Cause in my humble opinion, you’ve absolutely scored. You got yourself a hot young thang.”

Well, his first marriage hadn't worked out so well so...maybe that means nothing. Or maybe it means everything. Even if this marriage isn't at all like that one. John shakes his head, trying to dispel those thoughts.

"Thang?" he repeats, sounding somewhat amused as he slides back into the bed, still a little tense. "I think it's more that I don't remember. And I'm kind of surprised I got drunk enough to not remember a damn thing about last night."

"I know what I said." Joaquin smirks and tucks the blanket around the two of them once John's back in bed, laying back down on the pillows with an arm under his head so he can look at the older man. "Yeah, there's a reason Sam saves the gifts from King Valkyrie for Bucky.

"Look, I don't remember much either. But it coulda been a lot worse." He scrunches his nose. "You coulda married Alexei."

"Oh my god."

So, that's a point in Joaquin's favor, it's true. He thinks he would have thrown himself out a window if he'd woken up with Alexei.

"I can't really...imagine anyone marrying that guy." He's so over the top and in your face. It makes John's head hurt just thinking about it. He swings his gaze over to Joaquin.

"Yeah, no way, I couldn't do that," he says again. "I got a better deal here."

“Yeah, you did.” Joaquin isn’t actually so self centred that he believes John’s won the lottery or something like that, but it’s fun to play up the idea that he’s an absolute score.

To be fair to himself though, Joaquin always tries to see the best in others and does what he can to always be a good friend and person, so John definitely coulda done worse.

“See, just gotta look on the bright side. Alexei is a great guy… in small doses. Also imagine the scene he’d make. Of course, he is the reason we’re here at all.”

"I'm gonna hit him with my shield."

It's not like it's going to hurt the man. He's got a head as hard as titanum but it'll make John feel better.

He sighs and drapes an arm over his eyes, laying back while he tries to process this entire freaking situation. His head is still muddled and fuzzy but he's stopped panicking.

"Maybe he got married too," John offers after a second. "Or maybe he's in jail or something."

"Sounds like you still have a bit of tension to work out. Which means if that's what they were trying to achieve by this, they failed. Or I failed." Joaquin goes so far as to wink at the man, though he's not sure if John sees it before he covers his eyes with his arm.

"To who? Ava? Sam? Nah, unless he picked up a random sex worker who agreed to wed, I'd say marriage is unlikely." Jail however... nah, Mel would have gotten him out already.

"You could have done better."

Is he...trying to flirt? Maybe a little. It's been a long night and now he's facing down an uncertain morning but he's trying to look on the positive side.

Trying. He's really trying hard and he wants a reward for his effort. John rubs his face and then glances over at Joaquin.

"Fine, no marriage. Maybe jail. Or maybe he's just lost somewhere. I'm sure he'll tell us about it later. Loudly and in detail."

"Wowwwww." Joaquin stares at John for a long moment with an expression that is equally shocked and amused. "I'll have you know I have more of a praise kink than a challenge kink, so if you want me to do better maybe you should spank my ass and call me a good boy."

With a snort, Joaquin shakes his head. "You're not wrong but I also think there are more interesting things we could be doing than talking about what Alexei got up to.

"Like... we could talk about what we could be getting up to. Or, better yet, not talking."

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