Hm? Do I now? [Yes. Yes he did. But it was not like he was just going to admit to it.]

And I'd be so focused on keeping my entire body from shaking from the strange exitement I'd be feeling. Trying ever so hard to explain it away to myself why I'd feel so flushed and giddy just from a few simple touches to your hair. [He'd only had vauge ideas about what desire and love was back then and had had an embarrassingly hard time connecting the dots. But perhaps part of the problem was that he'd known he should not have such thoughts and feelings for his cousin.]I did not want to make you uncomfortable or... make it wierd, somehow.